God, You truly deserve all the honor and praise for everything You have done in my life. As it goes in the song I'm listening to right now...

You give me life
And now I give it back to You
With everything You've done for me
It is the least that I could do

Worry Free... it makes sense!

Auntie Agnes,

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! Your blogs and words have really, truly, touched my heart. Unconditional love is what we strive for as lovers of God. And as examples of that, we are to show it. To put whatever is in the past is hard, but to forgive and forget to those whom you feel have wronged you, is the ultimate goal. I really like your title, worry free. For what do I have to worry about when I know God will take care of it. I have no need to avenge, or waste time on pointless comments. To press forward is what I aim. Thank you!

The blog entitled Before I continue with the HW has received raved reviews! Below it are so many amusing comments, responses to the comments and responses to the response of the comments. Thank you to the persons who have commented and left their name. To Anonymous, I would thank you, but you're not a real person in my life because you leave me no name or form of identity. Like I've said before, you just can't seem to muster up the balls to do so because you know you would get so much scrutiny in person, am I right? I guess that it is truly you who has the cover up...?

I know that I have neither said that the relationship I have with Aaron is platonic or not. And do I have a need to because you are, obviously, of no significance to me if I don't even know you, let alone care for what you have to say? Who writes anonymous comments now-a-days? I guess people who can't keep their mouths shut about something that they feel, AND must somehow let it out WHILE being scared that they may be re-examined for who they are as a person. So I guess i can sum all that up in one word, YOU.

But hey, you know... it's okay. It really is. I post these blogs for a reason. My sort of way of letting out my inner turmoil. It's a place where I can write and reflect to myself, it just so happens that the public can read it too. And I don't mind that. Thank you for having such great interest in my life. Especially my "love life." My relationships are one that I have tried to seek approval from by the only person whom it matters to, God. So whether it is just a friendship or not, that's up to the Almighty Judge. No, not you.. you may think of yourself on some high pedal-stool, but you're not. He may speak through people in my life and I am fortunate because of that but who are you in my life? But I don't go on impulse and act upon it at once making drastic decisions in my life that affect the people that I love. No, I pray about it and discuss it with my dad and/or my pastor. I don't seek the approval of anonymous people because they are anonymous to my life. As it says in the dictionary, being anonymous means you are of having no outstanding, individual, or unusual features to me, which make you quite unremarkable and impersonal. 

Anonymous and fellow bloggers out there, you can go ahead and keep reading this blog because I will still post here. But next time you leave a comment.. I only ask that you state your name so that I know. And the other people who comment can know too so no one can be offended. Thank you, come again!

In reference to comment 5 on blog below.

My dearest Ron,

I dedicate this blog to you for your friendship... that and your hilarious comment. You truly are such a great friend who knows how to give some hospitable advice. I know you truly made me smile when I woke up this morning to read your comment. Thank you for making the points that I lack in saying because due to the lack of my "facts" available in my blogs, assumptions by strangers -in reading my blog- have been made. It's okay though, I know I can come to you when I am in "dispair" for some hospitable advice to make me a better person, for you do know me, talk to me constantly and see me often. Thank you, Ron!

Gianel

Before I continue with the HW

Lo and behold, "Anonymous," the person who seems to know me well enough to give me advice but cannot reveal their identity due to lack of balls, has commented me THIS once again:


Fortunately, I am blessed with a BFF who knows me, serves with me in the church, and actually talks with me about what I discover in life since I was 12. And she said this:


Thanks Selene. But she also has the support of one of my really good friends, whom I also serve in the church with, and talk to online and in person. And he said this short and sweet:


Thanks Ron and Selene. But my BBF (boy best friend) I've known for the past 5 years, whom I too serve with in the church, talk to daily and care for dearly also seems to have my back. And he said this, after the first comment that was left:


Thank you, Aaron. I've got a gang of supporters, I wonder who else they could rally up? Sorry "Anonymous," but they seem to want to know who is the person behind all this "wisdom." Though, I highly doubt this person will show themselves, they don't seem to muster up the guts to after being called out for their numerous pieces of "advice."

Thanks friends, it was a very surprising and reassuring gesture. I truly know ya'll got my back!

You know what I don't get... I don't get how I'm an adult, expected to make adult decisions, AND YET I'm still considered incapable of having the judgment of an adult. Is there a double standard? I believe so. Lord, as long as I know You can hear my voice, please remind me that every other voice in my ear - that is not Yours - does not matter.

I think I've just come to realize that I'm a bum. I live at home. Work once a week. Not inspired by much (I can still be inspired but it seems to take a lot in order to do so). My parents support me financially/scholastic-ly. I'm not doing too hot in school. Appreciation or acknowledgment is not necessary, but can't help myself from being disappointed when it's not met. I'm a bum, I gotta accept it. Oh well, I just need to let God (or allow God) to bring myself out of my bummy-ness. Boo bum.

Only thing I can think of.

"Now this is the story all about how my life got twistered upside down..."

Phantom of the Opera

My heart gets warm every single time I hear this song. I live my romantic life through Christine Daea

All I Ask of You

RAOUL:
No more talk of darkness,
Forget these wide-eyed fears.
I'm here,nothing can harm you -
my words will warm and calm you.

Let me be your freedom,
let daylight dry -your tears.
I'm here,with you, beside you,
to guard you and to guide you . . .

CHRISTINE
Say you love me every waking moment,
turn my head with talk of summertime . . .

Say you need me with you, now and always . . .
promise me that all you say is true -
that's all I ask of you . . .

RAOUL
Let me be your shelter,
let me be your light.
You're safe no-one will find you
your fears are far behind you . . .

CHRISTINE
All I want is freedom,
a world with no more night . . .
and you always beside me
to hold me and to hide me . . .

RAOUL
Then say you'll share with me
one love, one lifetime . . .
let me lead you from your solitude . . .

Say you need me with you here, beside you . . .
anywhere you go, let me go too -
Christine, that's all I ask of you . . .

CHRISTINE
Say you'll share with me
one love, one lifetime . . .
say the word and I will follow you . . .

BOTH
Share each day with me,
each night, each morning . . .

CHRISTINE
Say you love me . . .

RAOUL
You know I do . . .

BOTH
Love me, that's all I ask of you . . .

Anywhere you go let me go too . . .
Love me that's all I ask of you . .

Oh my gosh. I had totally forgotten that today was the 17th of September. Why is this date in my memory, it's because 2 years ago on this day my grandpa, Custodio Seisa, passed away. It's was a sorrowful yet spiritual lifting day. I loved my grandpa very much... and I miss him.

The Best Part of My Day... so far.

Short blogs are what I love best. They're sweet and to the point. WELL, after starting off the day feeling super "MEHHH...," my best friend gives me a call. And then we Skype it to make it feel as if we're with each other. We talked about facials, then what's new, what's been bugging me, people at school. And after talking to her, I realized that my shed tears are useless. The person who has always brought a smile to my face, has now got me veering away from my crazy thoughts and looking at how good I've got it. Thank you, God for blessing me with a best friend who is as crazy (or even crazier) than me. I love you, Selene.

"You're muh besssst friend!"

LoL

Blogger is becoming like Tumblr. They need to add more types of blogs you're allowed to post.

Anywho. I just came home to an empty house. There's always a sense of sadness yet excitement whenever this happens. I'm supposed to be cleaning, but I have stuff to do. Whatev.

Lyrics of the moment: That's How You Know - Amy Adams (Enchanted soundtrack)

my current definition

I can't think of a title.

Referring back to my last blog, I personally think that you can't lose your salvation. But it's the question if you really accepted God into your heart or just said it with your lips.

Enough about that. I'm sitting in my room, ignoring those who call me so I can settle down and do my homework. The only thing is that I have no motivation there. Yeah, I've been doing it all and I kinda (?) get it. But you come to that point in your semi-adult life - I say semi because I have no career yet - and question what are you doing with your life?

Yeah I know I'll never back down on God or turn away and question Him, but besides that.. I have no idea. If only I can talk to that one person who has always given me the sound advice that I need, whether it pertains to the topic or with about Gerard Way, but they're in class (boo school). I just need my head to be filled with more positive thoughts, instead of my own questionable ones.

Procrastination's shadow is coming... I gotta get going before it's all on me!

Title

I have not posted a blog up here for quite some time. People being stalkers didn't help the rush of it all. But as I am about to start my homework - I still haven't - I need to write this thought out. I was reading something about "being saved."

But what is considered to be "saved?" People may have their own take on this, but to me - from what I was taught - being saved is being rescued from your sin, turning from your old ways, no longer being dead and separated from Christ. Saved means accepting the gift of salvation, the free gift that not many people know there is.

So salvation. Sure you can know the meaning, and say that you are saved. But if you were to accept Christ as the Lord and Savior of your life, then seek advice/comfort/healing in a way that was not in Christ, do you lose your salvation? Or if you commit a murder and are addicted to drugs after becoming a Christian, are you still saved? The question is, can we lose our salvation?

I know I've had discussions about this topic with other Christian friends. Some believe that you can lose your salvation after one sin. Others believe that once you are forgiven then you are forgiven for life, no matter what. I agreed with that second statement. But that question of murder came up. And what if they accepted God and never turned back to Him again, are they still saved?

I was blessed with parents who grew up in Christian homes and were able to give me the best advice they can according to their judgment. My mom told me the answer that seems the most logical to me. She said that if a person was really saved - meaning that they had accepted the Lord as Savior - then they would turn away from the worldly desires. Although they may sin because we were made sinful people, a person who TRULY accepted Christ into their heart would be able to turn back to God, no matter what.

We ARE forgiven for sins of the past and the present and the future, but are we really accepting the gift? Are we saying that we are saved, but not living it in our lifestyle? Was there a point when you WERE living it, but you have gone astray? Or are you just saying it and going back to whatever YOU want to do?

Wouldn't a person who was able to be saved feel the love of Christ so much that all things should be lifted up to Him? What thing of the world could replace the satisfaction of Christ in your life? The question is no longer about losing your salvation, but rather fully knowing what it means in YOUR life to be saved?

This is a rather long blog... I guess it's food for thought.

Hmm... a thinker.

My brother gave me some enlightenment. He told me, "anyone can play that music, exactly like them even." Then he asked me, "but what exactly are you going there for, to worship or to see them play?" Hmm...

New perspectives are great for an open-mind.

I'm calling you out.

"it's catchin up" - anonymous

Wow. Do you even know me? Or talk to me everyday? Once a week? Once a month? Because if you did, by all means... I beg you to PLEASE  tell me as a friend of why you think so. I know that if we were friends I would be able to handle the news in person -face to face - not anonymous comments on a blog. And to that someone who I don't talk to.... WOAH stalker... why you checking up on me?!

But you know what, it's cool. I guess you can do that because it is the internet and you can hide you face, too ashamed to be identified with what you had said. But just to let everyone know, I'm not the type of person who let's everyone read my blogs publicly and then puts it on private when others disagree to what I have written. Read it in black and white, and leave a comment with your name if you'd like. I'd be more than happy to elaborate if needed!

This doesn't bug me, it's just annoying.

Way to get me, Enemy

I have not written a blog is quite some time. That's a shocker. But let's see. Re-reading my blog assured me of what I have to deal with. Having come back from a youth retreat, which was successful (I shared the Word to 4 people and they accepted!), I was faced with so many obstacles that would usually bring my spiritual high down. I mean some of them did, but I figured that it was only the enemy using people to bring me down. As much as people will talk, and I know that it will hurt, I don't need their approval. As long as I'm significant in God's eyes, nothing else matters. Talk badly and hurt me all you want, but I have a greater power supporting me than you ever will. It's all good though. My family, church family and friends have supported me and given me the advice that I've needed to hear, good or bad. 

I guess if you want to see people in a certain light, go right ahead and do it. But like I've told one person in my youth, don't make assumptions without hearing the whole story because understanding the whole story will open up your eyes to what the true face of the story is.

And whoever said that "having two faces catches up to you," thank you. That's advice I can use and I hope you do too. 

Blessed.

I just realized, I am really blessed. I'm not trying to brag, but God has given me all the things that have had such a great influence in my life. As much as my faith in God had been strong before, I only that when I worked for Him and sought out after Him, only then was I blessed with family, friends, romance, school. And the more that I served Him, the greater the responsibility got. But I know that I was placed here for a reason, and I know that it's going to get more difficult and I have to fight myself and others in order to get to my potential, my reward will be given. 

"Seek first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all of these things shall be added unto you." Matt. 6:33